some things feel more bitter and other things less sweet. a large part of me really hopes he's able. but there's that lingering feeling that this is the end. and the cycle resumes.

i guess part of the fear is because that would be the last thing i really have to let go of to follow me from high school. i don't want to let it go though. he knows me so well. i'm already so comfortable with him. i've already experienced too much to just say 'oh well'. i mean, maybe we don't have to completely disconnect. but that doesn't make it much easier. this isn't good or bad for us, it's just something we gotta do.

i don't want to. but it feels like a definitive aspect of growing up. ugh.